Wow, VBS week has passed. I am close to the point of exhaustion and here is my day. Wake up and pray. Have breakfast with the family while practicing my guitar. See the VBS group did songs and Karin & Cornelia decided it would be great to do music with the kids on Sunday morning, so I ended up doing it. Practice on Saturday and Sunday morning not enough, but only one direction to go right.

Then we got ready for church. Showed up at church went downstairs setting up for the kids. Very encouraged by the kids who were there (will tell you later, with the VBS recap). Then helped finish setting up at church, worshiped, led music for the kids. Immedately after the service we went into San Francisco for lunch with my brother-in-law who just ran the San Francisco marathon. Finished lunch, walked around, went to the store to get bread for communion. Drove home and dropped off the girls. Went by the store again to get communion wine, got to church and set up. Lead the worship part of the service while Matt Prince preached. Then had to do some very brief conseling with a transgender person who was recently ask to leave another church.

Made it home, watched the Simpsons and talked with my wife. Too much. Now I say good night and pray that God will give me the strength to make it through tomorrow.

This morning I was reminded of two very essential things. The first came in an email from a friend regarding our VBS. His statement was simple. Mike remember you have prepared for this event, done what God has required of you, and showered it in prayer. Perhaps this moment is about the few kids that you have show up, the students and volunteers you have helping lead, or maybe it is about you. God is always working on us. He does not leave us alone. The painting sits there, and even when we think that he has gone into the other room or started cleaning the floor we realize he still has the brush and adds another stroke. This week has been encourging for me, mostly in the simple smiles and winks from God.

The second thing I was reminded of was in the devotion with the mission team. The two things that the early church were about and particularly Paul when it came down to changing a city were prayer and sharing the gospel. Every moment of VBS is filled with the Gospel. When little boy told his mother, who probably doesn't believe yesterday, "Mommy did you know the boy God died for us?" That is amazing, here is a unchurched four year old sharing the Gospel with his mother after one day of VBS. Also this mission team is traveling all over the Bay Area and seeing and learning what they can be praying for. God has placed a wonderful burden on my heart to see the gospel go forth here, I do hope that he continues to bless this area. Yet I am sure in this moment that he is blessing me.

The best ideas come just before falling asleep. So last night after watching Million Dollar Baby and thinking about the bombings in London, just before that moment where I fall asleep, I had the greatest idea for a blog.

Tempted to get out of bed, turn on the computer and write, I did what most people would do. I fell asleep, playing it over again and again in my mind hopefully remembering it in the morning. No such luck.

Though I do remember having a dream about a pastor who I have a great deal of respect for. It was nice to 'visit' with this guy last night. Who knows maybe tonight I actually get out of bed before I lose it.

Uncertainty. That is what life is full of and often it can get discouraging. The job I have is filled with uncertainty. Uncertainty about what God is doing in people's lives and who is hosing you, Uncertainty what will happen each day, often I have no idea. Uncertainty about the future can be enough to drive you nuts. To hope in what God is doing is often hard, there are days that I am just unable to. Just this morning as I rode the bus, the ad to join the USCG seemed very appealing. Knowing what your purpose is, and what you are doing each day. These are the times when our faith is built.

As I am preparing for this Sunday I came across this quote that describes what I am feeling well. "If we don't communicate, we might as well remain silent. And if we don't manage to communicate properly what we think, we have to learn to speak better. " -Dr. Roger Nicole, What to do with people who are different than you. I feel like I am at a very intense time in my life, everything is happening at an accelerated rate, and all that we read on the news is about another suicide bomber or that China will use nukes.

I suffered a sever disappointment today when I spoke to my landlord and he was not interested in our offer to buy the house we currently live in. Since that discussion my neighbor next door brought me dinner and my neighbor across the street called to check in about the child exchange that she and Karin have. Both were daggers in my heart. What is the priority? Do we now forsake the relationships that we have spent two years cultivating in order to be good stewards and buy an over priced home in the Bay Area? All of the decisions are far to great for me to even get my mind around.

Honestly reading articles on unity in preparation for Sunday have settled my soul. I don't have time or patience for the cliches of God being in control and that he will work things out. My God is a present God, of course he has the future taken care of, but I long for him to blow a creator into my present circumstance. Perhaps if we lived more stable lives we would have the luxury of patience and waiting it out, but we live on a thin line; where our salary is based on support and in the span of seven days what little savings we had is wiped out. I know I am young ambitious and impatient, God will bring me through that, but I long to see him act in radical ways. This is the God who raise Lazarus from the grave, who turned the world dark when he died.

This Sunday we are baptizing a man in our church that has been attending for five years. His stories from his life are hard to believe, and yet God has grabbed a hold of him. He wrote me today and mentioned all the people who will be there for his baptism. He said they are really wondering what has happen to me, they think I've lost it. This man who has become my brother and I do feel like someone has let us out of the institution, perhaps they accidentally left the key in the door. But we are out now and we see the world, not just how it is, or what this God will do in the future, but what he is capable of doing radically now. I long for our service on Sunday to like having church in the circus, where all the performers have taken off their mask, where their real faces are wilder than their costumes and they find a master of ceremonies who will never beat them, forsake them, or abuse them, but will honor them, celebrate them, and allow them to walk the tight rope and perform arial stunts so strikingly dangerous simply because he is the saftey net.

It is nice when you catch a break, this morning I had just that experience. Since arriving back in Oakland I have been fighting battery problems with my 4Runner. It seems we left a map light on while in Seattle with the battery already near the end of it's life, this put it over the edge. But like any person trying to save money, I wanted to be really sure that was the case. So I continue to drive it, until last night, when trying to go out with a friend it was done.

So the plan was simple to wake up this morning ride the bus down to Kragen, get a cup of coffee and donut at Lake Merrit Bakery, purchase a new battery, and return home. Everything went just as planned including walking directly up to the bus stop after purchasing the battery and having the bus pull up.

It was only after I boarded did I feel strange. In this post-911, recent London bombing atmosphere I should of thought that a young man carrying a car battery onto a public bus might look suspicious. There were a few people who gave me very strange looks, and one man who might have taken a earlier stop because of my accessory.

I only had to ride the bus about ten blocks, as I exited the bus and thanked the bus driver he smiled at me and said, "I didn't see it before but you are not supposed to have a car battery on the bus." I smiled back, apologized, and thanked him again. The entire ordeal was manageable with the bus ride, without carring a 30lbs car battery 10blocks, that would have put me down.

I installed the battery without any drama, the car starts right up. Needless to say I am very thankful I caught a break today.

So I have just returned from Seattle, WA. Our family spent time there visiting with family, celebrating Aidyn's birthday, going to a friends wedding, and fundraising. Yet this was one of the most expensive fund raising trips I have been on. We decided to 'save' money by renting a car and driving up to seattle, which is only a 13 hour drive.

So on the way while Karin and I are deep in conversation I was interupted by a Oregon State Police officer who issued me an $237 speeding ticket. Word of warning to all, do not speed in Oregon. God is working on making me a wise person, needless to say I have a hard head and it might take me awhile to get it. On the way home while by myself, since my wife and daughter are vacationing in Montana, I was hit in my rental car with a tire that had been blown off of a tractor trailor. The tire did so much damage that I was unable to open my car door when I made it to a rest stop. Since Dollar rental car has no shops in Oregon, I had to drive the entire way home Dukes of Hazard style having to climb through the drivers window.

Lesson number two if you have a high deductable on you auto insurance be sure to get the daily insurance from the rental car company. Needless to say there are many shoulda coulda woulda's, but God is good. He takes care of us and I was not hurt.

This appears to be a season of trials for our family so please pray for us. Thanks.