There appear to be so many obstacles against what is appearant to me to be good things. Everyone understands that peace is a good thing and yet some feel it is necessary to declare war in order to achieve it, that boggles my mind. The issues I am perplexed with on a daily basis tend to not be quite so large. Often I am not sure whether it is just my youthful ambition in which I still feel like I could be a part in changing the world, even if that means only on my street, or the struggle of those my age desiring to be in the position of power that is now occupied by the boomer generation.

Regardless I don't understand why people would not want to be invovled in a loving faith community search to gain a better understanding of God, the gospel and how their lives are impacted by such things. Yet it seems to me there is so much struggle and battle over where we worship. Why? I mean isn't our place of worship meant to prepare us for the struggle of life? The place where we go to learn how to face, impact, and love those in our family and work. Instead it seems to me we just carry over the battles going on in those places and use where we worship as the place that we beat up on people. I don't care what the issue is, it can be race, theology, genuine connection, or sexuality. There is just a constant beating up of eachother rather than an embracing in love.

Now I get confused because I know in order to embrace in love we must struggle with each other through these problems, yet sometimes all I want to do is kick someone in the head. Or throw my hands up and say don't let the door hit you on the way out. I guess what I realize in this is that for most people faith/worship/whatever tends to only be one compartment of their lives, whereas for a spirtual guru (like myself) my faith is my work, family, friends, and place where I come to experience God. Makes for an awfully strange life.